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Pauline Pantsdown
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"Pantsdown will try the backdoor into Parliament"

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8 October 1998 - Homosexual Government: I'll run it my way, says Pantsdown Ms Pauline Pantsdown declared yesterday she would take control of the Government and "run it myself", moving the Parliament from Canberra to the Mardi Gras office in Newtown.
4 October 1998 - Pauline Pantsdown chose to wear two new red tops on this day of crossroads for Astaya's future. As she entered the Polling booth to cast her own vote in the Federal Erection, Pauline Pantsdown exclaimed: "After the Erection there will be no Paulines or there will be two Paulines."
3 October 1998 - Its a busy day: The Federal Erection and the Mardi Gras Sleaze Ball, and Pauline Pantsdown has a starring role in both events. Events during the day include a grandstanding appearance at Fish Records.
2 October 1998 - Pauline Pantsdown spent the day meeting, greeting and soliciting up and down Oxford Street in the last few hours of the 1998 election campaign. She has singlehandedly woken up Astrayans to the most important issues facing the country  today. 
 As has become usual on Pantsdown's appearances, thousands turned out to see her,causing traffic chaos as drivers stopped to cheer her on, calling out "Pauline, You're our Backdoor Man", "Drag Queens Speak for Me, Mother", and "I am a Caring Potato, too".
1 October 1998 - Pauline Pantsdown announced her electoral preferences and her vision for an Astrayan republic to a massive crowd of over 500,000 youthful Resistance supporters in Sydney's Martin Place yesterday. 
30 September 1998 - "October the 3rd will be the biggest day in Astrayan political and party history. Remember this - the only way you will have good government is by having a good Sleaze Ball - something we have not had for some time, at least a year I think. I hope they play Neil Diamond." 
"The true opposition to Pauline Hanson's One Nation's influence is not Pauline Pantsdown - it never was - it is you and your support - this is where the true opposition against them is. "
29 September 1998 - "I'm just so delighted that the appeal was accepted," Miss Pantsdown said "I was just very upset by trying to hide it for so long, and I'm just so pleased everyone knows. What I've called for is a homosexual government, yeah. Join us, be one of us come out, be one of us, yeah. I'm a backdoor man for the Ku Klux Klan with very horrendous plans. I'm a very caring potato.
28 September 1998 - Operating behind enemy lines in Pauline Hanson's seat of evil, Pauline Pantsdown was determined to look her best.
Ms Hanson, whom Ms Pantsdown has vowed to destroy in her quest to replace the racist Hanson-Howard coalition in the bush, had visited Henty Nazi Hall of Infamy on Tuesday.
This morning, it was Pantsdown's turn, so she went shopping in Albury.
27 September 1998 - According to the latest ACNielsen poll, Pauline Pantsdown is assured of taking it up her seat in the NSW Senate, One Nation will not win anything in NSW or anywhere else for that matter, and the Australian Democrat's Senate vote is surging ahead of its lower house support.
26 September 1998 - This morning In a tumultuous news conference at the Kingsteam Sauna, Pauline Pantsdown pledged to boost Aboriginal, Queer, Aged and Women's health programs, noting that official statistics indicate that Aboriginal people have very high rates of infant mortality.
25 September 1998 - Pauline Pantsdown greeted Mrs Hanson as she alighted from her Federally funded limousine. "Mrs Hanson would you like to withdraw your racist comments?" Pauline Hanson fled.
In stepped 0055 National Socialist Dave, he wanted to know what remarks they were. Pauline Pantsdown listed several of Hanson's divisive comments.
24 September 1998 - The Federal Government yesterday delivered Ms Pantsdown a boost to her campaign, giving her permission to visit the Barracks Leather/Uniform Bar at the rear of the Taylor Square Hotel.
After midnight Butch Bear Steve escorted Ms Pantsdown in a tour of the bar's tank museum, flanked by gay men in combat gear.
23 September 1998 - Pauline Pantsdown addressed the Astayan people this morning on National Television to confirm the mounting speculation that she had indulged in inappropriate behaviour with an absolutely gorgeous NSW Senate candidate. "And I have the stains on my dress to prove it, yeah" she admitted.
Pantsdown scores #1 on TripleJ Net50!
22 September 1998 - Miss Pantdown called for One Nation's abolition and for a Royal Commission into the organisation, a call which was based on public demands for it to be made accountable for the funding it receives.
"There is monies that have been wasted and all the Queer Austrayan people want is a fair go - they want accountability and I'm going to continue to call for it," she said.
"And besides, why have an organisation that is purely based on racism alone.
"I call everyone who supports these racist policies as being racist themselves, and it's wrong and it stinks and I don't like it," Miss Pantsdown said.
21 September 1998 - Pauline Pantsdown had her primary industry policy to launch, but Jeff Kennett was in town on the same day - neither of them really knew why they were there in Noosa, but  wouldn't it be great if they ran into each other? 
20 September 1998 - "Too many right wing extemist groups come out here, rip off this country for what they can get out of it and leave our shores with the money that could be staying here in Astraya ... That's what's happened to Astraya where you've got 90 per cent of right wing extemist Astraya that is foreign controlled."
18 September 1998 - Ms Pauline Pantsdown was escorted  through a Perth shopping centre by police and security personnel yesterday.
Supporters mobbed Pauline in one supermarket and forced her to take refuge in a coffee shop in a second, its entrance blocked by a line of police.
17 September 1998 - Pauline Pantsdown chose to wear a black pleated mini-skirt to meet students at Sydney University today. She claimed this was to divert interest from the real issues of the campaign. 
Sources close to Pantsdown told the Fan Club that this skirt was bought from the very same shop where Pauline Hanson purchased a similarly bad taste outfit before her Western Australian tour, evidently for a similar purpose.

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